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Escape The Fantasy

by Public Access

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1.
Exit Strategy 04:10
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Exit coming Please don’t make me wait If your exits coming Don't make a mistake Cause there's a difference between thinking about something and doing it after Distance between reading about something and seeing it happen I see when i look back in time a life i barely recognize Holding on isn’t always right I feel myself slipping behind Potholes on a busy road like Waking from the longest dream The road is closed and there’s no exit There’s no point in bothering Paddles laying on the boat but I cross my arms and float upstream I don’t know I don’t know Current calls me back to where I Started I wish The waters honest I close my eyes, and look I back on it I take a breath, but it seems no better in retrospect Exit coming Please don’t make me wait If your exits coming Don't make a mistake There's a difference between thinking about something and doing it after Distance between reading about something and seeing it happen I see when i look back in time a life i barely recognize Holding on isn’t always right I feel myself slipping behind And as I leave the scene I see a fire in the wake Voices gather round me as they beckon me to wait What an opulent display! Gaze into the brightness and I wonder if it's safe I could think about it longer and then maybe I would stay What an opulent display!
2.
Kings Way 04:12
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For a little while I was living the good life Sought it all I would get it in due time Thought that I’d moved on but I didn’t Push it aside, we’ll be goin in no time Another escape from the living we don’t like Thought it’s what I want but it isn’t And now I’m hanging on the brink with my best friends Trying not to fall in the deep end And now I’m hanging on the brink with my best friends Trying to discover my One way to get over yonder One way ticket over yonder How I’d hate to be alone at my bedside Cut my losses, why, why, why?!?! I thought that I’d move on, but I didn’t But maybe I could have my pride in my mind If I could last another empty night I thought my reign was strong but it isn’t And I was hanging on the brink with my best friends Trying not to fall in the deep end And I was hanging on the brink with my best friends Trying to discover my One way to get over yonder One way ticket over yonder Kindness couldn’t save the king Wait for what tomorrow brings Never thought that loss was certain Never mind that go the king’s way
3.
The Happening 03:56
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Caught up in the happening Questioning my own being Still I wait for something Lost up in the happening Taking time to piece through it Still we can’t yet see the end Caught up Lost up Caught up I want to catch the train that goes to the end If I can’t have you now then when Caught up Lost up Caught up My head My fault I wish I knew it would take this long If I could get out of my head If you knew it was my fault Gone gone would you still be gone Caught up Lost up Caught up Caught up in the happening Alone with just my own being Ashamed of what I know the best The feeling when I look south-west
4.
Delaware Water Gap (Semester) 04:37
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Caught up in the happening Questioning my own being Still I wait for something Lost up in the happening Taking time to piece through it Still we can’t yet see the end Caught up Lost up Caught up I want to catch the train that goes to the end If I can’t have you now then when Caught up Lost up Caught up My head My fault I wish I knew it would take this long If I could get out of my head If you knew it was my fault Gone gone would you still be gone Caught up Lost up Caught up Caught up in the happening Alone with just my own being Ashamed of what I know the best The feeling when I look south-west Delaware Water Gap (Semester) (Apr 2022) Winter is cold For a while it snowed And the water’s frozen over Where the boats used to go Tell me, if I found a way to melt it Would I find you at the water gap Not complaining just observing That the river seems to flow Through the marshes and the barrens Out from Delco to our home Meet me in the middle I’ll find you at the walking path All along the stream of thoughts I see i see i see i heard you Said you only do what you want I was beveled by your every remark I tell i tell in parallels Tales of how you came so far We came so far oh Stared at the map till it’s clear that I’m lost No light from the stars, I started to talk then I Lost my voice, it turned to a cough I might take this semester off Oh Delaware Delaware Delaware You found me at the water gap
5.
Prosopagnosia 05:03
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Prosopagnosia I hate that I notice Every stone cold look on your face Smile without embrace Deep in your cortex You’re bogus, please focus On the wide eyed look of my gaze Do the anecdotes cascade? Agnosia! Prosopagnosia! Agnosia! Prosopag- Straighten your head i can see the hypnosis You’re making no sense like there’s damage to Broca’s Did you forget all the old sobriquets? Well I hope you’ll remember this I went back to the old fort So forlorn in the dirt The sticks were all a miss but still I Perched inside like a bird Shaded by the elder oak Letters carved into the bark Written in there cuneiform Tangible but very worn Never so confused before The fuse inside ya fusiform Blew on that day the tree Fell in our forest and It made no sound But it left a trace It’s only a face, it was always your face Neurons Fire in motion I’m gone But please keep me posted Hello anomia we’re here once again Hearing your voice but I don't understand Ran to the ocean you stayed with our friends I won’t spend this summer alone in my bed Dry were the eyes and the words that were said Drowned by a spring that was born to forget So dry me a river and fill it with sand I won’t spend this summer alone in the bed Fine then go cause You're making me feel like a no one So stuck in my rut But I will not pick the phone up Fine then its over So don’t try to crash on my sofa Maybe I’ll think with my head not my heart You know that I’m kidding so don’t even start Everybody leaves you so blind.
6.
Peregrine Falcon 04:27
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Thousand tulips in a field That we wont see this year It’s not that they don’t grow But you don’t want to go You never really did It was all for me The love we have as kids And lose in mystery What is your favorite color Which one smells the best Where are we eating later Should we take a rest Our friends won’t understand this I doubt they ever could I’d spend a hundred years Walking around this neighborhood Maybe it wouldn't be so bad If we could wait and see Plum trees turning red Leaves all in the breeze Haven't talked in quite some time Scared to find I know what's right Do I, wander on through tired skies To nest inside despite the flight Or maybe, dull the heart, sharp the mind Cause peregrine falcons mate for life Fantasies at the brink of night Started to think I wasn’t made for life! I circle round when ya get me high as a kite This purple town filled with ghosts yet to die We’re mortal now drifting off as we glide To a portal down, near the coast, say goodbye Despite all it’s worth Rewrite all the words We’ve yet to unearth Despite all it’s worth Rewrite all the words This hindbrain might work Exit all dependency (Caught up) I might escape the fantasy (Lost up)

about

CAN YOU ESCAPE??

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released December 2, 2023

Engineered, Mixed and Mastered by Kai Polidori at Purple Cave Studio
Album Art by Ethan Valliath

Public Access is Ryan Puharic, Jonah Levin, Liam Mühler, Josh Skoudis, Alex Giarretta, and Matt Perkins

with additional performances from

Andrew Hoefele - Saxophone (tracks 1 and 2)
Bryan McNaughton - Trumpet (tracks 1, 2, 4, and 6)
Patrick Heeb - Keyboard (tracks 3, 4, and 6)

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Public Access New Brunswick, New Jersey

embrace the meteor, escape the fantasy

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